Thursday, August 30, 2007

9/01/2007 12:30 PM

It's almost here! Go Ducks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, August 25, 2007

A few observaitions from Canada

Canadian beer sucks

Slurpee's taste different in Canada

Budweiser and Coors are in the import section

There's a lot of bad drivers

They don't know how to spell. It's center, not centre!

Why are the police still called the "Royal Canadian Mounted Police" when most police officers are not mounted.

ATM's are called ABM's (Automated Banking Machines) and you can choose between English and French. I wanted Spanish!

Friday, August 17, 2007

My Last Bog as a single man

This is a historic post for Dennis' Daily rant. This will be my final post as a single man. Tomorrow at 2:00 PM PDT Dennis Micheal Cook, the founder, President, CEO and supreme dictator of will wed the lovely Carrie Marie Lintner. Will anything about my blog change after I get married? NO! You will still find the same blogging excellence that you've come to expect. In honor of my upcoming honeymoon in the nation of Canada, I leave you all with this:

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!

From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

I really don't know what to say about this one

Back in June I blogged about the $54,000,000,000 lawsuit against a laundry mat owner who lost a clients pants. At the time that was the most ridiculous lawsuit I'd seen. That all changed today when my soon to be wife emailed me a story from A South Carolina prison inmate has filed a $63,000,000,000 lawsuit against embattled NFL Michael Vick. He alledges that Vick stole two pit bulls from him for his dog fighting operation and then sold them on ebay and used the proceeds to buy missles from the Iranian government. I'm assuming this lawsuit will be thrown out almost immediatley and if it's within the judges power I hope he can tack some more time on this dudes sentance for waisting everyones time. Here's the story from Fox News, please read it along with the pdf of the complaint filed in court.,2933,293268,00.html

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Wednesday Morning Thoughts

First I want to tell everyone that I hate going to the dentist. Problem number one is why do dentist and doctors offices have four month old magazines in the lobby? It's August 8 and I was reading all about the Florida Gators second consecutive National Title in Basketball. Problem number two is the strategically placed "Stages of Gum Disease" chart in the exam room. For forty minutes I had to stare at this chart that showed pictures of everything from healthy gums with nice white teeth all the way to puffy bleeding gums with black and yellow teeth. Problem number three is scraping. Having someone scrape at your teeth for thirty minutes is one of tortuous things there is. The good news is that I had no cavities!

Thought number two, Barry Bonds is now Baseball's all time Home Run leader. I have mixed emotions on this. Being a Giants fan I'll admit that there was part of me that was cheering for him. Did he use performance enhancing drugs? Probably. Is it a tragedy or a Dark moment in Baseball history like some have labeled it? No. It it is what it is, he's got more home runs than anyone who has ever played the game. The last twenty years have been "The Steroid Era" in Baseball and Barry Bonds is the best player of that era. If Baseball wouldn't have ignored the steroid problem in the beginning than we wouldn't have any problem. Bud Selig and friends are just as much to blame as Barry Bonds. Everyone who bitter and and angry about this can take comfort in the fact that Alex Rodriguez will break the record in seven or eight years but who's to say he didn't cheat?

Third thought is that it's almost football season. Three weeks from Saturday my beloved Ducks take on the Houston Cougars at Autzen Stadium. I'll return to my usual seats in section 24 row 24 along with Carrie and Justin when he decides to show up.

Fourth and final thought for the day is days of being a bachelor are numbered. Friday will be my bachelor party. I hear that we'll be playing video games, drinking diet Pepsi and eating carrots so nothing too crazy will happen. A week from Saturday is my wedding so that's pretty cool. Hopefully all the usual people are still in my section including the nice old ladies Harriet and Janet and the old guy that doesn't have a name. Go Ducks!!!

Friday, August 03, 2007


The most amzing thing about this video is that guy walks away.

Farewell to a Friend

One of the hard parts of getting married is saying goodbye to certain things from my bachelor days. Last night I said goodbye to my favorite chair. The brown recliner has been a part of my life since 2000. It was one of three relics left from the old Chesterfield lane residence (see my post from May 2006). The chair has followed me everywhere I've lived since college and has been good to me. Unfortunatly there will be no room for the chair in my new place so I had to say goodbye. I put an add on Craigslist for $20 and within an hour I had ten email responses. In the end some college kids came by last night handed me $20 and left with the chair. I'll miss the chair and my one hope is that its new owners are as good to it as I was.